And I won't even get started on the whole insular world that is academic blogging, with all the above inanities tagging each other with memes. "I tag WonderProf and TeachingSuperstar with this newest meme: 5 authors you'd like to poke with a stick and 5 sexual positions you could get into where it'd be easiest to revise your un-sellable and boring dissertation."

I found it so incredibly funny because I see us in this post; I see myself. (Yes, I can and often do laugh at myself.) Check it out but be warned--don't have coffee in your mouth.

Damn you, clock!

eta: Okay, the one thing that makes this bearable is having doggies snuggle up with me on the sofa while I drink my coffee.

Borrowed from Earnest English

(Yes, we had waffles here this morning; and no, they weren't the frozen kind.)

The questions is, Bloglines or Google Reader?

Thoughts, feedback?

It's an Electra Cruiser Gigi (here's a close up).

I haven't ridden a bike in--seriously folks--over 20 years. It was never my thing. But Mr. Cheeky's big Four-O is coming up and he wanted an Electra Townie. We've been looking at and testing out bikes for him and before you know it his enthusiasm wore off on me and, voila! Last night we picked his Townie up and, after riding the Gigi around in the parking lot of the bike shop (it's soooo much more comfortable than the 10-speed from my teens), I was sold.

Now I get to be the chubby chick on a bike in my neighborhood. (BTW, would it surprise you to know there's a community of plus-size cycling bloggers? I found them by accident while searching for bike reviews. Damn, I love blogs.)

I am so not happy with last night's primary results. Yes, I am an Obama chick. But more importantly, regardless of who the nominee will be, we (Democrats) need to wrap this thing up sometime soon--we cannot let this drag out until May--and start focusing on the general election or else we'll be at a major disadvantage. So please, can we just get this over with?

Howard Dean, I'll be waiting for you to step in and help get this deal closed one way or the other.

Wow. I have such mixed feelings about your news. You are so bitchy that I cannot imagine you would be a very loving parent. Profs don't have to be substitute parents but they do have to have some mentoring abilities and you have shown absolutely none in your rants against your students. I have wondered about the deal with your dog so it makes sense that you have a dog and not a kid. Please really get your act together before you make this decision. You can't change kids like you did universities. What you get is what you live with, love, nurture (if you have that in you which I doubt), support forever even if she is not the picture perfect baby/child/teen/young adult you think you deserve.

Oh, sweetie. You obviously believe that one can gain a full picture of what a person is like by reading her or his blog. I'm sorry you are so naive; hopefully you're not a grad student because this would really reflect poorly on the critical thinking/information literacy abilities (or lack thereof) you've picked up in your studies.

A few quick comments. First, your reference to changing universities is lost on me as people (not just academics) change jobs (even careers, in fact!) all the time. Perhaps you are unhappy at your job or feel stuck and are doing a bit of transference, hmmm?

Second, it's not at all clear what you meant by "the deal with your dog." (I have 3 dogs, by the way, not one; something you'd probably know if you actually read this blog). Please, when criticizing someone, try to make your criticisms more clear. (Notice my attention to detail in my rants about students.)

Third, of course no one "deserves" a "picture perfect" child. However, often times children's behaviors reflect those of their caregivers and if children (and young adults) have entitlement issues and believe the world revolves around them it is often largely a result of how those children were raised (you may wish to read about Millenials and helicopter parents for a glimpse into these issues). So no, I don't expect any sort of behavior from a child. I do, however, have expectations that Mr. Cheeky and I will try our hardest not to facilitate this bullshit that we (and most of our friends and peers) find so obnoxious and offensive in many young people these days.

Last but not least--and certainly the most fun for me--I'll probably delete any future comments from you that I don't like. (Ooops, is that bitchy of me? I hope so. I've worked so hard for this reputation!) You see, that's the right one has with one's own blog. Of course, it's your right to not read this blog and expose yourself to my fiendish ways, or to start your own blog and rant all about me. Hell, you could even come up w/ some cool name like "Concerned Americans Against Cheeky." I'd be honored, actually.

I hope you don't mind that I'm drawing my readers' attention to your comment as I've got a feeling they'll enjoy it as much as I do.

Don't get me wrong; I've not morphed into a church mouse nor have I given up all of my sarcastic, bitchy goodness. But due to various life changes the past couple of years, perhaps the most significant of which is one many of you followed here on this blog--my leaving Asshat University due to getting denied tenure and coming to Big State University--I am considerably less frustrated with life. I am, dare I say, content. And wow, content should not be underestimated! This has all led me to further contemplate the importance of liking one's work. At Asshat University I knew I wasn't happy but believed that unhappiness was restricted to my professional life. Now in retrospect I so clearly see the extent to which that professional stress and dissatisfaction influenced everything else in my life. It took some perspective--getting away from it--to see what should have been obvious.

Now that I enjoy my work again (sure, some students still piss me off; what professor doesn't experience that frustration?) everything else seems to be falling into place. Of course, when it comes to blogging, this also means I have to think longer and harder about blog posts because I have many fewer "you won't believe what moronic thing a student did this time" posts or "what an unbelievable clusterfuck this departmental meeting was" posts.

I've also been preoccupied with trying to figure out what I want out of life, or the rest of it anyway (ex: the vegetarian thing referenced above). Maybe this is because my 40th birthday is later this year (eeek, writing it makes it seem so real!) and it's causing some reflection. Who the hell knows.

And then there's the international adoption issue. I'm not even certain I mentioned this here before and if I did it was probably a brief afterthought sort of thing. But we're doing it. And it's happening sooner than we anticipated. I received a call last week in which I was basically told there would be an infant girl available for us this summer as long as we got our shit together (home study, etc.). This summer. THIS SUMMER. As in 4-6 months. We're not ready. I'm not ready. Even as I type this I feel as though I'm talking about someone else.

So, yeah. That's what's going on here right now with blogging and life changes and bitching (or lack thereof) and babies.

Hugs,
Cheeky

Tonight it's supposed to get worse. Thank doG for pajama pants and hot dogs.

1. Click on this link. The title of the page is the name of your band.

2. Click on this link. The last four words of the final quotation on the page are the title of your album.

3. Click on this link. The third picture is your album cover.

4. Add your band name and title to the picture.

From: JerkOff
To: A List of 15 Professors

My name is Joe Blow. If any of you has any openings in your classes or any seats open up in CLASS 200, CLASS 201, CLASS 207, CLASS 315, CLASS 318, CLASS 326, CLASS 402 let me know ASAP. Thanks.

I ignored this b/c the ASAP and generic mass mailing rubbed me the wrong way. Plus, I have no openings. Then this morning...

From: Professor A
To: Reply All [including student]
"asap"??! Wow.

From: JerkOff
To: Reply All

[Professor A's First Name],

I don't know who was supposed to get that message but it's very unprofessional. I need to add classes and you need to help me. You should remember that if it weren't for students you wouldn't even have a job. I suggest you get back to me with a response instead of wasting time emailing friends.

And to you other professors that got this email,

I would appreciate a response to my email about getting into any of your classes by the end of today.

JerkOff

This is when I snapped, and sent the following:

Dear Mr. JerkOff,

I cannot speak for all professors on your email list although I am certain many will share my sentiments.

In your second email to all of us you stated that the professor who sent the email commenting on your "ASAP" request was "unprofessional." I would suggest your email messages are unprofessional and that is probably the reason you have not received replies from all the professors on your list. You see, unlike what you believe, professors do not work for you; we work for the University and there is a difference there (which I would be happy to discuss with you in my office). Thus, it's not appropriate to view your professors as the customer service agents of education.

Regarding your first email concerning the overrides, please keep in mind professors receive numerous requests for class overrides each day. Sending a mass email to a long list of professors with an even longer list of courses you are looking to get in to is probably not the best strategy. Also, requesting a reply "ASAP" is presumptuous (hence Professor's A email comments).

Finally, it is inappropriate to address a professor (or any professional person) by her or his first name (as you did when you replied to Professor A) unless invited to do so. This should be basic protocol. Although many professors ask students to use our first names, using "Dr." or "Professor" is expected until that time.

To answer to your original question, there are no openings in my courses and they are wait listed.

best,
Dr. Cheeky

Almost immediately the student replied...

From: JerkOff
To: Reply All

Dr. Cheeky,

You may think that my email are unprofessional but *I* am a student and not a professor (so I am paying money instead of getting paid money). So I do not think I should be held to the same professional standards. And since I pay to go to school here I expect a normal response and not making fun of me.

I maybe didn't ask the best way but I do not think the way I send messages should affect professors responses unless I am being unreasonable in my email, which I was not. You think its inappropriate to approach a professor by their first name and I think it is inappropriate not to reply to students quickly when they need to get into a class. It is your duty to help me with this.

JerkOff

From: Cheeky Prof
To: Reply All

Dear Mr. JerkOff,

I do not wish to argue with you, either. On the contrary, I believe that by changing the way you approach professors will positively affect the outcome. My intention was to aid you in future interactions.

Two points. Your suggestion that students should not be held to basic standards of professionalism is, quite simply, incorrect. A university is a professional setting and we are all expected to act accordingly. Whether or not you choose to acknowledge this fact and act accordingly is up to you.

More importantly, you stated that, "I do not think the way I send messages should affect your response." Well, of course it does, and as a junior I have a hard time believing you haven't learned that. Surely if not from a class then from life experience you must have learned that the way in which we make requests affects the responses to those requests. Furthermore, email can be more easily misinterpreted than face-to-face interaction, therefore, one must be careful to construct messages in which the tone or intent is what the sender wants to convey. Asking for feedback "ASAP" and "by the end of day" is probably not the most effective way to make a request online because it may be perceived as rude, even if that is not your intent. Simply put, the way a message is sent absolutely affects the response to that message. Choosing to ignore this or believing it should not be this way will not change the fact that it is true.

best,
Dr. Cheeky

ETA: So far I've received email from 4 other faculty on the original email list thanking me for my responses to JerkOff. I'll keep you posted if JerkOff gets back to me or comes by my office. Or fills out a comment card and drops it in the box by the hostess stand.

ETA II: JerkOff emailed me again and continued to argue with me. He simply just doesn't seem to get it. He wrote, "professors....should be held to a higher level of professionalism than students because of their positions" and "my communication style should not affect whether or not I should get a response." He wants to come in to meet with me to discuss this. Fine, except I don't know what we're going to discuss. He's wrong and clueless. He doesn't seem to get that. I don't know what he's expecting me to say. Professor A has been in touch with me and JerkOff is meeting with her, too, over her oh-so-offensive "ASAP?! Wow!" comment. He said he may stop by tomorrow or early next week. Will keep you posted.